Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Randomize
