I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
