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• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  what's the vibe there?

  (917): View more from New York City

  extraordinary amounts of gine

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"

  (1-513): View more from Ohio

  You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.

  Fav 30 994 1960

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• (503): View more from Oregon

  I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!

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• (313): View more from Michigan

  I wish costco sold astroglide.

  (248): View more from Michigan

  i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.

  Fav 41 3293 1451

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• (540): View more from Virginia

  Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.

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• (240): View more from Maryland

  I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.

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• (713): View more from Texas

  I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic

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• (705): View more from Ontario

  You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.

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• (210): View more from Texas

  Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  Why is there bacon braided in my hair

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.

  Fav 7 708 2009

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• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.

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• (502): View more from Kentucky

  Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"

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• (469): View more from Texas

  It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.

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