i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
