I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
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