God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
