do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Randomize
