Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
