Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
