what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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