Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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