hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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