I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
