Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Randomize
