1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Randomize