I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize