I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
