that's an acceptable place to lick
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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