yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
