you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
i think my cat just said my name.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize
