i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
