sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize