You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
