we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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