You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
