what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Randomize
