i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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