What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Randomize
