i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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