Pappa wants mamma naked
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
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