Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
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