you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
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