sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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