WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
