Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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