you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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