I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
