Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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