so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize