Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Randomize
