Midget sex pt 2 tonight
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
