i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
