We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I bet he comes in French.
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
