i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
