K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
this will be a night to untag.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Randomize
