i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
