I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
