Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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