you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Randomize
