your room smells of hookers.
And success
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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