So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Randomize