hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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