Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Randomize
