She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize